The Heartcry of a Prodigal

Turn and answer me, O LORD my God! Restore the sparkle to my eyes, or I will die. Psalm 13:3 Loving and Merciful Father, I come before you now, I put my trust and my confidence in you alone. Lift me up Lord, for I am cast down. Quicken my heart and draw me to yourself again. There was a time Lord, when my prayer was like incense going up to your throne, your Word was a lamp to my feet and a light to my path, I ate your Words and they were as honey to my taste, I was like a lamb that was made fat with the choicest food and I was made strong like an eagle by the Words of your mouth. It was my joy to spend time in your presence to gaze upon your beauty and inquire before your throne. I was indeed glad to be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than to dwell in tents of wickedness. My joy was complete when I met with the brethren encouraging them and building them up in the faith. As a good shepherd, you led me beside still waters and my soul was refreshed. I was sensitive to your voice and you led me in paths of righteousness and holiness. But today Lord, my eyes have become dim for I have lost my spiritual vision. Good seed had been sown in my heart, but the cares and worries of this life have choked it. Temptations of every kind come like whirlwinds to shake me off the ground and more than these, there are sinful passions, fleshly lusts and evil desires that continually wage war against my soul. Sin has been crouching at my door and I have been powerless against it. Busyness has seeped in keeping me occupied with other less important things in life. I have failed to keep guard over the gates of my soul – the eyes, the ears and my mouth and as a consequence – the world has made it’s way into my heart. Lord, your Word says that If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them (1 John 2:15) the Father’s love have I despised, I have forgotten my first love, I do not desire the secret closet as I did before, I can go on for weeks without prayer and reading the Word and feel no guilt in my spirit about it. I have declined spiritually and with each passing day my heart is changing, it’s growing cold to the things of God. Anointed preaching does not move me anymore, worship music fails to touch my heart, encouragement and exhortation from other believers don’t seem to get through me. Sin is no longer loathsome to me and my heart is no longer grieved when the name of my Lord is despised. Now Lord, I present my case before you. Because of the multitude of your mercy, I pray revive my heart. Let the fire of your Spirit be rekindled in my heart again. Draw me in Lord by the power of your might. I reject sin in every form and I call upon the name of Jesus who gave his life on the cross for me. Your blood O Lord will cleanse me, by your wounds I will be healed and restored. Lord, you are my redeemer, you are my advocate before the Father and you are the righteous one. I will be made righteous not because of anything I have done, but because of what you did on the cross. Take away this heart of stone and put in me a heart of flesh. Write your laws in my heart that my life will be guided through them. Send your Spirit O Lord and let the Love of God be poured into my heart again. That I will take hold of you and never let go of you for one single moment. That I will commune with you and put away all distractions that hinder me. That I will soak myself in the Bible and let Your Word permeate my being. That I will not let a single day pass without spending time with you. That I will relish times of corporate worship & anointed preaching. That I will close every door to the devil in every form and that nothing of this world be found in me. That I will pursue the Father’s heart relentlessly. That I will spend the rest of my days hungering that thirsting for righteousness and holiness and that whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – my thought life may be filled with them. Hear me O Lord, this is the cry of my heart to the God of my life. Amen!